Sunday, November 16, 2014

Life Happens or You Happen


So I didn't follow through with my post plan but I'm here now :) I've had an emotional couple of weeks and I could really use community right now. One week ago we took my 15 year old dog, Baby, to the vet. She was really old and not in great shape when we took her. Unfortunately my family and I had to make the decision to  put her down that day. My heart is broken. Not a lot of people can understand the connection between a girl and her dog but I grew up with mine. She accepted me quirks and all. I loved and cared for her in return. I've been on this roller coaster from deep sadness to happy highs.

Through this negative experience a creativity has been sparked. I've been writing songs and creating art but I still have the issue of....I'm creating but I'm not sharing. Part of me feels like I'm fighting against my own success.There's this voice telling me that what I'm creating is no good. It wants to crush any sort of productivity I have and it's confusing. I don't know if 25 feels like this big confusing mess to everyone or if it's just me. I feel like I should be in a different place but I'm not and I feel like what if I'm waiting my entire life for that light bulb moment that will never happen....

I'm not sure where to go from here or what to do. I don't have my own space so it's not exactly the best space I have here for creating...But than maybe that's an excuse. I don't know.

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